Holly passed away

Holly is in the middle, eating strawberries.

Today was Holly's birthday, marking four years since we adopted her. It is also the day that we said goodbye.

Two weeks ago, I noticed that Holly's eye looked cloudy. We rushed her to the vet and were told that she had an eye infection. We immediately started her on antibiotics and pain meds and brought her home.

A few days later, I left to Texas for a week for my little brother's High School graduation. Huz stayed and took care of Holly and the other buns. He gave her meds and cuddled her and monitored her.

When I got back last week, we noticed that she wasn't eating and her eye wasn't improving. We took her back to the vet, who recommended that we schedule her for surgery and have the eye removed. We were worried she would lose more weight and get weaker if we didn't. We were also concerned about the pain she was experiencing. We would love our Bun whether she had one eye or a million, and just wanted her to be as comfortable and healthy as possible.

We took her in for surgery this morning. Huz got a call from the vet saying that Holly had been a trooper through surgery, and had done great, but just wouldn't wake up from the anesthesia. They tried to warm her up and bring her heart rate back up, but it kept dropping until it stopped completely. She died peacefully in her sleep. We got to see her and pet her and tell her we love her one last time. She will be buried on a farm in Napa, surrounded by grapes (which were her favorite treat).

I am heartbroken. I just can't believe that just four years ago on a sunny summer day we brought home our sweet, nervous bunny, and today, on a cold and rainy day, she left us. I know we gave her a good life and that she always felt loved and taken care of. We did the best we could for her, and I treasure every day I got to spend with my sweet Holly Heart. It just sucks and I really really really wish she was still alive.

Huz is really sad too, I know, but he tries to be strong for me. I think Hef and Jude know something is wrong because it seems like they keep looking for Holly. They check her favorite hiding spot and come to the front of the hutch as if to ask us, "When is she coming home?". I'm so sorry guys. This morning she was here, and now she's not. It's going to take time for all of us to get used to it. I love you and I am so sorry.

I'm not looking forward to tomorrow morning when I'll wake up and most likely forget, and have to remember all over again that I won't see her anymore. I'll have to remember that I have two bunnies now, not three. And when we pull our Christmas stuff out in December and I see her stocking- yeah, that's gunna suck too.

But I'll face that eventually. Today I'll think fondly of my Holly, and wish her a Happy Birthday and Goodnight.

Thank you Lord for blessing my life with Holly, and for allowing me to be her Mama. She was a joy to have, and I'm better because I love her. I don't understand why she's not with me anymore. I don't understand it, and I don't like it, but I accept it. I know her life had a purpose. She was a precious gift wrapped in fur, and I am thankful that she was mine.